Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Ball Peen Hammer by Lauren Rowe

TBall Peen Hammer by [Rowe, Lauren]

AMAZON (Free on Kindle Unlimited) 


Ball Peen Hammer by Lauren Rowe 


From the USA Today and Internationally bestselling author of The Club Series, Lauren Rowe, comes a sexy standalone romantic comedy novel unlike anything you have ever read before: Ball Peen Hammer.

"Keane Morgan wouldn’t return any of my calls or texts, and I was pissed as hell about it. I didn’t want to drive from Seattle to L.A. with the guy any more than he wanted to drive with me, but I had no frickin’ choice in the matter--at least, not if I wanted to use his brother Dax’s coveted parking spot at UCLA. 

Okay, so it turned out Keane was objectively gorgeous, and, fine, pretty funny, too. But did he have to be so damned in love with himself? I mean, jeez, the cocky way he flashed those dimples was just so orchestrated. And, honestly, what kind of guy uses the phrase “baby doll” with a straight face? Oh, that’s right: the kind of guy who’s a male stripper. 

Yup, the cocky jerk turned out to be Seattle’s answer to Magic Mike, a stripper known as “Ball Peen Hammer”--which meant Keane Morgan was emphatically not the kind of guy I’d ever fall for. 

Not. At. All.

No freakin’ way.

Well, until Keane convinced me to fall for him, that is. 

Which I did.

Hard."

Indulge in the enticing words of this phenomenal author, as she invites you into a world filled with passion, lust, and forbidden desires. One of the sexiest novels ever written, while still maintaining an enormous amount of wit and imagination. If you thought you would never be able to get into romance novels, it's time to think again.

NOTE:
Ball Peen Hammer is a full-length, standalone sexy romantic comedy about Keane Morgan (one of four Morgan brothers introduced in The Club Series) and Maddy Milliken (the little sister of Hannah Banana Montana Milliken). 

Although Keane and Maddy’s love story is set in the universe of The Club Series, it is a standalone novel with no cliffhanger and no prior reading required. Due to strong language and sexual content, this book is not intended for readers under the age of 18.

Check this out!!!!! 
I've contacted Miss Lauren Rowe and had an awesome chat with her :) She's as awesome as her books are ! Seriously!! 
Sadly Ball Peen Hammer was released over a year ago - so she's in the middle of writing a new book and her head is full of that character - but she sent me the link to one of her Character Interviews ! 

Mister Ball Peen Hammer
Answers My Five Burning Questions and more

1.    Let’s start off with Kill, Marry or Screw? Selecting a person to kill, even hypothetically, is really bad karma, baby doll. I certainly don’t want someone plotting to kill me, so I’d better pass on that. Marriage? Pass. I’m too young to be making lifelong promises to anyone about anything. I can barely keep a promise to call my momma tomorrow. Screw? The only person I have any desire to screw these days is the one and only Maddy Behind the Camera, Madelyn Elizabeth Milliken. Yee-boy! Sexy girl.
2.   What would you do if could do anything in the world?That’s easy. Pitch a no-hitter in the World Series.

3.
 
What do you love most about your girl?Man, my girl Maddy’s a smart-girl. A helluva lot smarter than me, that’s for sure. And she’s funny as hell, too. (True story: Maddy made me laugh yesterday, right as I was I taking a sip of orange juice and it totally shot outta my nose, brah. Hilare.) And she’s talented, too. And so fucking sweet, sugar won’t even melt in her mouth. Most of all, though, I think I love the way she makes me feel about myself. She makes me feel like I can do anything–like I’m some kind of superhero. She makes me want to deserve the way she looks at me.

4.
  What animal are you most afraid of?
Okay, bear with me here, brah. What’s that little animal that hides in bushes and then sneaks out and kills you? It’s a stealthy little fucker, but I can’t remember what it’s called. But, anyway, that’s the animal I’m most afraid of. Bee tee dubs, when I asked my best friend Zander what that animal is called, he was like, “A snake?” And I’m like, “No, dude. Not a snake. This stealthy fucker-thing is a mammal.” And Zander was like, “A stealthy mammal that hides in bushes and then sneaks out and kills you? You mean, a lion?” And I was like, “No, fuck! No, not a lion. It’s small.” And Zander replied, “And it sneaks out of bushes and kills you? There’s no such animal, Peenie Weenie. You’re high.” Well, fuck that! I’m positive that deadly little mammal exists, I just can’t remember what it’s called. So, yeah, whatever that thing is, my answer to your question is that. (And to answer the question that’s surely rolling around in your head right now: No, Zander and I were not drunk or stoned or otherwise chemically impaired during the conversation detailed above.)

5.  Finally who is really your moms favorite?
There is no “really” needed in this wording of this question, son. If any of my three brothers or sister think it’s one of them, then I’d posit the following query: “Who gets extras every time Mom makes lasagna? And who makes Momatron laugh ‘til she literally pees? And who used to write Motherboard little poems when he was a little dude? That’s right, son, the one and only Keane Elijah Morgan. There’s no doubt Momma Lou loves me the most of all her five kids, and if my siblings disagree they can SUCK IT! *drops the mic* (Ain’t no shame in my game. I’m a momma’s boy through and through.)

6.For bonus points, what’s your favorite swear word?Oh, man, that’s like asking me to pick a favorite child. I love all my children equally. But, okay, if pressed, then I’d say I’m an ardent fan of the word “fucker.”
Jen's Review 5 Stars!

OMG!!!! This book is like no other! I cannot believe this book exists and it's not the talk on every book blog yet! 

Ball Peen Hammer - aka - Keane Morgan - this guy will get anyone wrapped around his little finger with just a shot of his dimples - the way he talks, and thinks, and the way he moves - just absolutely phenomenal!  Seriously! How did the author create some of the things that came out of his mouth!?  I was laughing so hard!  I have so many quotes highlighted on my kindle, I don't even know where to begin! 

*Sigh* 

If you have no idea who Keane Morgan is, that's ok - because this stand alone book will explain it all - sure it's better when you know who his brothers are, and his mom - OMG! That phone group text while they were at the gas station reminded me of my kids! Yes I'm cool and I know where the microphone emoji goes in a conversation - but I have mis-used it a few times with my kids and got the full on lecture and even banned from conversations - I am totally in love with the whole Morgan family ) 

I've read Captain, and I"ve read Ball Peen Hammer, and now I'm ready to go back to the "The Club" and start at the beginning :) I'm totally looking forward to it ..


BUT THIS STORY....... Maddy is Hanna the Banana's sister - who is Henn's girlfriend - if you don't know who they are, it's ok :) 
Anyways - so Maddy is moving to LA to start her Jr Year at filming school - her story is sweet. She just wants a place to park her car that's close to school - and luckily her sister lives in the apartments just a few short blocks away, along with Dax Morgan who lives accross the hall, so voila! Maddy gets a parking spot! And she'll be on the road in no time! 

Hanna is worried about Maddy making the 2-day drive by herself, so Dax says his brother Keane will ride down with her since he's been meaning to come out to LA for awhile now. 

Only getting ahold of Keane is not happening! 

OMG Ok - so we meet Keane - he's a male stripper - NOT a gigolo - he's in it for the illusion that lets these women want him. He's got his mind power sublime messages that will make you roll your eyes, yet want to try them out as well. 

So being a stripper takes up a lot of his free time, and sometimes he just doesn't feel like picking up his phone. 
One thing about the Morgan family, is they're close - really close, but when Keane sees the text from Dax saying he needs a favor and to call him ASAP - he kind of skips over it. nothing good could come out of a favor from Dax - right? 

Well - a few days go by and he gets the text from a Maddy Million (I think is her last name) talking about a trip - but he has no idea what she's talking about, so he's not going to deal with that until something jogs his memory - 

Then we get a fun little stint with Keane and Zander (OMG Zander and Keane together - in Captain they were funny and awesome all in their own way, but in this book! Together they're really a force to be reckoned with!) and a new text from Maddy  - 

I'm totally not doing this book justice with this review - for that I'm sorry! I don't want to spoil his sense of humor - it's a shock to read some of the things that come out of his mouth - like his 10-year plan with married women?!? OMG! his logic is so..... out there - and yet this is something he strongly believes. 

The conversations they have in the car on the way up there will really blow you away. 
Seriously - I just have to say read this book :) It will be added to my read again shelf :) 

I Think this is probably my favorite quote from the book -really sums up Keane Morgan 

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